And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
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