You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize
