So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
