Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
