I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
