i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
