Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
