Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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