you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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