FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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