we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
