Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
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