Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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