Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
