You work out of a Hotel?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
