If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Randomize
