It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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