Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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