My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
