Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I touched a dick in church today
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
