i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
