Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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