yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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