I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
