what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
