Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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