Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
