pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
