Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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