Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
