Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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