I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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