we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
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I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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