Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
