She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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