if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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