And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
