OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
