doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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