You work out of a Hotel?
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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