Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
