i really wish james franco would like my vagina
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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