i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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