K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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