So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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