Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
