I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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