The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
