Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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