matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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