So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
